it’s 6:00am on a saturday morning, and i can’t go back to sleep. this is about the time that boerne would be jumping onto the bed, begging to be fed or petted.

boerne died on thursday. he had been my buddy for 10 years.

yesterday i felt surprisingly OK. i kept myself busy and out of the house all day. then i came home and the reality of boerne’s absence kicked me in the ass again.

skokie’s been very, very clingy since thursday….which, i think, helps both of us.

the vet did an autopsy. she found a small growth in boerne’s heart and one of his ventrical walls was “paper thin.” i think she mentioned something like “cardio myopathy” or vestibular-blah-blah, but i really can’t remember. i was a little angry at her - i had taken boerne in to see her on Tuesday, and she said he was fine. “he’s just getting older, and gravity’s getting the best of him,” was her assessment of his sudden balance problems. in the end, though, i suppose there isn’t really anything she could have done. boerne was always rather sickly.

anyways.